We Forgive You Terrorists

I have no way of being sure if SD is the first media entity to publicly forgive the terrorists, so I'm just going to assume we are. A few things, we are a media entity first off. Dmur owns NPR, hot.pork is John Stewart and I'm Rupert Murdoch. We hate to come out this way, but we had to. I guess I didn't really give away Dmur's name mostly because I'm too lazy to look it up. Nextly, that's not a word. But anyhow, doesn't this completely contradicts yesterday's post about the true author of SD Begins? Yes. I guess it's up for you to decide whether we're a young boy making youtube videos that his sister has to upload because he can't use a computer due to his mammoth hands, or if we're a group of media superstars.

Go with the latter, it'll make this post more fun.

Anyway, we want to take the time out of our busy schedules to apologize to the terrorists. Seriously, this whole war? Not cool of us. It's gone on way too long, and we're sorry. Although we're an all-star team of influential people in the media, we don't have that big of say over what countries we go to war with. Other minor things, like what planets we go to war with, that's all us.

We can't end this war. We've tried. Really. And every time we see video of us bombing you or killing you innocent terrorists, we burn an American flag. It's horrible what we're doing. So if you can see it in your beautiful, end-of-book-Grinch-sized-hearts, forgive us please.

I have recently discovered something so alarming that I immediately ran to my computer and started typing up this apology letter. I'm going to also mail a copy to the terrorists with a box of cookies in hopes we can get them on our side.

Quick note- I'm mailing it to:
Terrorists
378 Mulberry Street
Cave, Cave 1095cave

But how much postage should I put on the envelope? I think two stamps will do.

Anyway, onto the footage. Once again, terrorists, our bad. Please forgive us. We started this war on false pretenses. We were duped. We were so angry the Towers were gone we were willing to believe anything, and we did. So we attacked. It's a bit late, but I'm sorry. Maybe we can hang out sometime.

Well, here it is. One image basically absolving the terrorists of everything, and that makes us look like ginormous douches. Our bad.










Never forget. Now let's find this blue fuck and turn him into a melted looking version of Nightcrawler. I couldn't think of a blue liquid, and that was what came to mind first. But seriously, murder this monster!